jbwordsmith: (contemplative)
[personal profile] jbwordsmith
So Jaime and I were speculating tonight, and decided that:

A. For girls, it's true that "absence makes the heart grow fonder."

B. For guys, it's pretty much "out of sight, out of mind."

In other words, girls analyze relationships much more than guys do. Or so we think. But we don't really know.

Anyone want to weigh in on this topic? Is our theory based in fact, or is it flawed in some crucial point?

Date: 2008-01-02 06:44 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] leahjoy.livejournal.com
Since I returned to school, I have found less interested in the guy I was dating last summer, but he still seems interested, about the same as before it seems. I don't know... I think I'm just weird, so your theory may be perfectly good.

Date: 2008-01-02 06:54 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hischosenbride.livejournal.com
In my experience, I would say that theory is at least 95% true.

Date: 2008-01-02 06:59 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kellchecker.livejournal.com
I think it's totally right on.

Date: 2008-01-02 08:19 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] everydayjoy.livejournal.com
I would really be speculating just as you are, but I'd have to agree!

Date: 2008-01-02 01:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] eattheolives.livejournal.com
It sounds logical to me!

Date: 2008-01-02 03:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] annabanana86.livejournal.com
I think in my (very limited) experience, this would be true.

Date: 2008-01-02 03:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lovedandamazed.livejournal.com
Personally, I don't think I would agree.

Date: 2008-01-02 05:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] missbusylizzie.livejournal.com
Maybe sometimes. But from the limited information I've heard about the strange and mysterious minds of guys, I would probably say it depends on the people and situation. ;P

Date: 2008-01-02 06:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] abideinchrist.livejournal.com
Heh. We need some guys' perspectives here. :P

Maybe we're clueless, Jess. ;-)

Date: 2008-01-03 02:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gracegirl.livejournal.com
That's what I thought....::off to e-mail my brother, who always has interesting insights, lol::

Date: 2008-01-02 07:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] delightinginhim.livejournal.com

Just from what little I know ( and sometimes I am in awe by how little I really do know) I would say that it is true. From the relationships I'm in and around, it certainly proves so. However, I would not be quick to say that it is like that for every girl or every guy. I know of some guys who it probably wouldn't be true for. But as a general rule of thumb, yes.

Date: 2008-01-02 07:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nelliegirl.livejournal.com
I've found that to be true, in general. But then, I'm a girl.

Date: 2008-01-02 07:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] asourceofjoy.livejournal.com
I am sure there are exceptions, due to circumstance and personality...but in my experience I have found this to be quite too true.

We need some guys' input here, though. ;-)

Date: 2008-01-02 08:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sir-flute.livejournal.com
Hmm, I guess I'll be the obligatory guy and throw my two cents in.

I do think that guys have more of a tendency towards that but I think it's really important what length of time we're talking about here. If we're talking a couple weeks or maybe a month, I think it's still that "absence makes the heart grow fonder". Longer than that though and I think it takes serious effort to not turn to "out of sight out of mind".

That's just my two cents though and I'm sure it's different for different guys or the type or length of the relationship.

Date: 2008-01-03 06:09 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] completeinhim.livejournal.com
If we're talking a couple weeks or maybe a month, I think it's still that "absence makes the heart grow fonder". Longer than that though and I think it takes serious effort to not turn to "out of sight out of mind".

That's a good point. I know that principle has applied in my own life, especially if you're not in regular contact while away. No communication = no relationship, and even the wayward minds of girls will stop analyzing eventually. lol. Then again, I don't always think like a typical girl, so my opinion could be skewing things.

Date: 2008-01-02 08:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] catatinan-maid.livejournal.com
are you talking about a couple or two people who haven't told each other about an interest? With the former, I would say the guy is just as much thinking about it as the girl. No idea on the latter :)

Date: 2008-01-02 09:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] completeinhim.livejournal.com
oh, I meant the latter. I agree with you about the former, although I haven't any personal experience. ;)

Date: 2008-01-03 04:09 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
OK, I'll dissent here (with a few caveats) and say that, depending on the guy, it's probably half and half. Just because a guy may "pick things up where they left off" from when he last saw you doesn't mean he didn't think or evaluate anything during the meantime. To a guy, that's the logical & orderly progression of how things "should" be. It's a journey, not hopscotch or leapfrog.

Of course, all that will depend on the personality of the guy and the depth of the relationship. Shallower or "surface" relationships are "out of mind" more. But yes, some guys do think of relationships, how much they invest in them, and evaluate if they need maintenance.

We do know it's about more than hanging out. Give us that. ;)

Date: 2008-01-03 04:12 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gx76.livejournal.com
>sigh< ^^ That was me. ^^ Sorry.

Date: 2008-01-03 06:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] completeinhim.livejournal.com
No problem. And that's an amazing icon. :)

Date: 2008-01-03 07:13 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] abideinchrist.livejournal.com
I think he needs some more creative ones though, he's used that one forever now, and hasn't gotten his point across. :-P lol

Date: 2008-01-04 12:06 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] princess-mia.livejournal.com
Sounds like something I have noticed. Some guys are different from the norm though.;)

Date: 2008-01-04 08:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tomnoir.livejournal.com
Hi - I got here somewhat randomly and saw this post.

I would disagree, at least for my own personal male self. Although I probably am more prone to relational over-analysis than most guys.
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